In September 2017, I had a chance to meet Dr. Hazem Saleh, former Consul and Director of the Egyptian Bureau for Cultural and Educational Affairs in Canada. What I thought would be a short and sweet interview was actually a three-hour meeting, like old friends catching up. In fact, Dr. Saleh is one of the friendliest, most optimistic and knowledgeable consuls I’ve met. I am honoured to have seen him and witness his contagious positive energy. (more…)
How to accept having a broken hip, just like Jacob?
Honestly, I don’t know. I tried to make myself feel better by comparing myself to other people, but it made me feel so much worse. I was either envying people with perfectly amazing lives, or judging them without wanting to judge them, just to make sure I didn’t mess up too bad, or crossed the line. But the problem is that I mess up badly everyday. Otherwise, I wouldn’t feel like disappearing.
After comparing myself to others, I looked up stories of saints and prophets from the Bible. I did feel less alone, but that didn’t change anything. I still felt horrible because I didn’t and still don’t have their faith. Because I couldn’t accept my mistakes, I felt doomed, almost destined to be broken. (more…)
Last week, after I was done work, I tried calling my parents, but none of them picked up the phone.
Then I thought of calling any of my friends, but I knew they wouldn’t pick up as well: blame it on the busy life.
But then again, they might not necessarily be busy. They might not be my friends after all.
And when those people don’t pick up, I usually call you because I know you will. You always have time for any of your loved ones.
But as I was starting to dial your number, I realized you won’t pick up the phone.
“It’s not my #responsibility to be #beautiful. I’m not #alive for that #purpose. My #existence is not about how #desirable you #find me.” – Warsan Shire • i remember waiting in some of my favourite #parisian #streets when i passed by that little #mirror on a #wall. it’s #written on it: “mais oui t’es belle (of course you’re #pretty)!” i just thought that was the #cutest thing ever. it made my day and i thought, what if everyone had that small sentence written on their own mirror when they wake up in the #morning 🌝and when they go to #sleep at #night 🌚. there should be a mirror like this one in every #city 😁. you agree? ✌🏼
one day, something will turn your #world upside down. or maybe it already has. it could be a text, a #phonecall, a letter, a #facebook post, a #party, a bad or good grade, a loss, a rejection, a first job, a camping trip, a #car accident, a simple encounter with a #stranger, a trip to #Paris, a shooting, a #disease, a natural catastrophe, a #breakup, a new #friend, a #creative project, a #dream come true… anything. you might think you’re experiencing #hell on earth. but sometimes, it’s only when you burn that you get to know #peace. it’s only when your #soul hungers that it seeks His #word to be nourished. yes, you’ll never be the same, and no matter how tragical it seems, it doesn’t mean it’s #bad. trust me. i mean, here i am #writing, after walking through some flames (knowing that i’ll probably walk through some more in the #future) more #alive than ever.
i am thankful to have been born and raised in a #country that promotes #love #freedom and #equality. where #terrorism and other similar #violent#attacks don’t happen often. i am thankful to live the #life i’ve chosen and walk freely, being myself, in a democratic country. i am truly #blessed but how can i be at #peacewhen i hear gunshots from a privileged skin colour triggered at #humans in the country next to mine? how can i be #happy when i hear the #screams of humans simply asking for #democracy on the other side of the #ocean ? i can only #pray and hope. #hopethat my little #voice won’t be covered by police sirens everywhere. hope that my words will be read, no matter the number of readers. hope that i don’t forget to #writeabout #love. hope that all this #pain will end.
i remember #feeling #broken and #lost for a while and i kept #asking myself, “who am i called to be?” then one day, i #read one #simple sentence that shook and brought me instantly to #tears: “He is broken for us to be whole.” in this phrase lies the main #purpose of our Lord Jesus Christ: Him dying on the cross to #save us. He broke Himself completely for us not to be broken. He went until the #endto make us whole. how about that for #unconditionallove? this kind of #love is so unfathomable to me, i still #struggle to #understand it. that means that every Sunday during liturgy, i witness His crucifixion all over again. this is what the fraction of the bread is. God clearly stated that the partaking of the bread means the partaking of His body. therefore, when i see the bread being broken before my eyes, i see Christ being broken. that little piece of bread has the #power to #heal my #souland make me whole again. can you believe it? Christ used His brokenness and His pain as a means of hope and forgiveness and love for all His children. this moment during mass is so #beautiful and sacred to witness that it makes me wonder: how can i have the opportunity to assist liturgy when i don’t deserve it at all? well, i guess that’s the reason why we bow down and close our eyes (i speak mostly about orthodox liturgies) during this specific moment, a pure and divine mystery.